a partnership by any other name
by loopdedoop
Summary: One is made of lies; the other is a master of disguise. Together they're perfect partners - in crime and love, and in demise. Hisoka/Illumi
1. prologue

- - _prologue_ ;

* * *

><p>"You're correct.~"<p>

Everything, from the first time their eyes met to the decisions that followed since, culminated in this very moment. Right here. Airship bar, overlooking the city bustling with life below.

The curve of Hisoka's lips is cold and starkly less human than Illumi's own needles. Illumi has three needles in each hand resting between the spreads of his fingers, but the coolness of the metal is insignificant to the chill rising in his chest at the flare of Hisoka's _aura_. There's no mistake that the magician is angry, and the darkness clouds over any lesser emotions Illumi could have perhaps picked out otherwise.

"Let us fight," Hisoka invites as nonchalantly as if he was merely commenting on the view outside. He doesn't look at Illumi again, instead returning his own gaze reflected in the glass panes of the window. "Since you no longer interest me."

(_Catch it_. _Tell me I'm lying to you right now. Tell me you _know_._)

Illumi's voice comes faint to both of their ears. "Very well," the assassin murmurs, and something audibly snaps.

When he feels Illumi's _nen_ surge into a delicious pre-battle state of preparation, Hisoka almost laughs out loud. Oh, my, he does end up laughing out loud, and it's tears of mirth that dot his eyes as Illumi's _nen_ spikes further in wariness to his odd reaction. He has to clasp a hand over his eyes before he can tear them away from the window and control his giggles, but the image on the glass will stay with him.

And when he moves from the window, he can feel it, too—the looseness in the front of his pants.

There's no heat, no excitement.

Hisoka has never been so _unfulfilled_. He's never been this _not_ turned-on by the prospect of fighting a prey that could stand with him on nearly equal ground, whose _nen_ was as black as his and whose abilities he could admittedly respect. But that was exactly why this had to end. Hisoka could be extremely patient, but he's tired of being patient for this. Whatever 'this' was, it ends today. Right here.

Feeling like a lifetime ago, on an airship headed to the very same destination, had they also not met 'right here'?

.

/ / / / / /

* * *

><p><em>AN:_ A Hisoillu fic as the HxH anime comes to an end! The Chairman Election arc just _screams_ Hisoillu and I was inspired to do this thing. The next chapter is done and I'll post it over the next few days, and after that expect very very very slow updates. I'm not even sure what this fic will entail, I just want lots of Hisoillu. ;-; Cute fluffy Hisoillu as well as very angsty Hisoillu, and possibly character death(s). Haven't quite decided yet...

I'd actually written this with Hisoka's card suit symbols but FFN strips them all out, so please imagine lots of spades/hearts/clubs/diamonds with his speech as you read.


	2. first meet

- - _f irst meet_ ;

* * *

><p>The bar was crowded that night. Even after a few good shots of whatever alcoholic concoction had caught his attention (it was fuzzy and pink, and did the job of dulling his migraine a little) and over the general buzz of the room, he could still pinpoint the <em>nen<em> of someone interesting. _Hm. 90, no, 95 points. _

This someone was floating on the other side of the room. Hisoka could feel the pair of eyes on him, but ah, he supposed he was rather eye-catching. Hehe~

He sobered slightly when 95 began to move towards him. Of course, there was still no real cause for concern, but Hisoka did have quite a reputation, no? He doesn't think he actually has any notable enemies per se, as anyone annoying enough would have been, ah, _played with_ already, but he was not careless enough to let himself be surprised. His grip on the hidden card in his hand tightens an inscrutable amount and he waits.

The seconds count down as he spends them thinking of pretty carvings of carnage and a prettier opponent, bloodthirsty and faceless, and oh~ my~

95 glides into the seat beside him. He files the pleasant thoughts away for the time being. The glass of his drink reveals the features of the newcomer. Hisoka can see long, black strands of hair that falls past broad shoulders and an eye potently black, and it almost makes his heart race.

Ah, well, he supposes he should start the conversation, if only to get the newcomer's name. '95' was too impersonal for his tastes, and such strong potential deserved personal~~care from Hisoka, yes?~

He lifts his glass; the ice cubes clink as he downs the final sip of his beverage and sets it back down. "Another one," he calls for the bartender, and turns to smile brightly at the man beside him. "Would you let me buy you a drink as well?"

Now that the other man is looking at him too, he can see that he's not wrong about the eyes. They're deep in their darkness and this time Hisoka's heart rate does pick up. Those eyes reflect the soul of the owner, or the lack thereof in this case, and that thought alone excites him. The man's skin is deathly pale, a heavy contrast against his hair and eyes, and Hisoka can't wait to see it flush from exertion and dye it a red so bright in a glorious battle to the death.

And he was getting ahead of himself again. His thoughts like to flow quickly, already analyzing the extent of potential yet to awaken, and his fingers twitch and curl eagerly in a simple _want_. But first, introductions. "I am Hisoka, the magician ," he says silkily, having decided on a whim to play the mysterious card. He felt a sudden need to impress this stranger that had come over to play with him. "And what may I call you, my dear lady…?"

He'd meant the last part as a joke. A joke! It was part of his role, you know, the joker. Still, he supposed he deserved the punch headed straight to his face. He barely manages to dodge it, but doesn't expect the underhanded kick below the bar table that makes contact with enough strength to almost fracture his shinbone if he hadn't hardened it with _ryu_ at the last second.

…So the other man doesn't have much of a sense of humour, it seems. "Ow," the magician pouts, half-amused now. The other half of him is, well, rather aroused. The pain shooting from his right ankle kind of does that to him. Slowly, he raises his hands in mock surrender. "Apologies for my earlier rudeness. You _will_ let me buy you a drink to make amends, won't you?"

"I'll have whatever you're having," the stranger's voice is unaffected, but Hisoka can detect a slight look of distaste in the otherwise blank expression at the bright pink concoction placed before him. "I must say… the rumours don't quite do you justice, Hisoka."

It's a slow thundering heat that sneaks its presence into his chest. The intonation of his name, spoken plainly, deliberately, and Hisoka immediately decides he likes the sound wouldn't mind hearing it again.

"Maa, that's not fair," he pouts some more, the response leaning on the automatic side since some part of him is still dazed from feeling. "You know my name but you still haven't told me yours. (^_~)"

Hisoka registers the shape of the pretty mouth opening and forming the shapes to allow three syllables to be uttered before he hears the name itself.

"Illumi."

And so Hisoka attaches this name to this score to this face and mentally catalogues him as a 'strange fruit to be explored at the soonest break in my schedule' and sits a bit too rigidly in his seat to curb his instinctive urge to ravage this Illumi immediately. Noo~, that wouldn't do at all. How uncivilized and un-gentlemanly would he seem, and what a waste of precious potential would that be! No, Hisoka drank potential like wine-drinkers drank wine; he swishes it around the glass, admires it by look and by smell, and when he finally downs it the well-aged cacophony of flavours burn him in ecstatic hell.

A coppery tanginess floods his tongue. It seems in his haste that he'd bit down on it and drawn blood. The taste is detoxifying, stimulating, and he tries not to make too frightening a face. Illumi didn't look the type to be intimidated easily, but still. He looks about to speak, and Hisoka presses his bruised tongue against the roof of his mouth and lets little shocks of pain keep his mind alert while he listens.

"I'll cut to the chase. You see, I've heard about you. This meeting of ours is no coincidence, owing to the fact that I actively tracked you down."

Oh? Hisoka wonders if he should act vaguely impressed. He does anyway, because he _is_ a bit impressed. His finger taps at his shot glass in thought, and finally concludes that it is.. odd. People who have heard of him tend to stay far, far away. Or they're idiots, but this Illumi doesn't look like one. His mouth curves into an indulging smile as he leans forward in his seat. "Ohoho, so you've done your research on me. And to what do I owe this pleasure, Illumi-kun? "

Illumi has turned away from him to face the bar table. To onlookers, they may seem like two unacquainted young men each nursing their own drinks, half a meter of space stretching between them. Maybe one of them strikes a casual conversation and the other agrees superficially, and then they lapse back to their silence while the rest of the activity in the bar continues on. But that isn't how this goes. Illumi has invested an unhealthy amount of time getting to know the secretive con-magician named Hisoka, and an unhealthy amount of money getting Millu to dig for more information where his own sources failed him. Even that did not get him as far as he would've liked; where he would normally have gotten a full background check, he only found bits and pieces of Hisoka's life like he'd flitted in and flitted out wherever he pleased and hid his own life where he hid his cards. Illumi had to admit his intrigue, and it was that which settled what he was about to do.

"You took the Hunter Exam this year," Illumi states matter-of-factly.

For a second, Hisoka wonders if Illumi had been among the entrants, too. He waves that thought aside as unlikely, for he would certainly have recalled such striking hair. All of the examinees had been boring, so Hisoka played with that one examiner instead and that had been a disappointing experience. He'd heard that Hunters were supposed to be so strong, too! But Hisoka hadn't been made a Hunter, and Chrollo hadn't either, and Hisoka would rather like to dispute with that claim. What a waste of time it had been… time he could have spent tracking down Chrollo, not that that ever turned up fruitful. Ah, seriously, that man was more secretive than him.~~ It really turned him on~~

Distractions, distractions, distractions. Hisoka pushes the remainder of his drink away and makes a satisfied sound in his throat, waving an airy hand at Illumi to continue.

"I… desire your assistance," says Illumi, in that smooth, exacting tone that hid nothing and betrayed nothing. There is never any hesitation in Illumi's words for each one is both calculated and honest, but these words feel foreign leaving his mouth like he didn't expect a need to ever say them. Not a need, either. He's not used to accommodating his own wishes.

Illumi's not particularly prideful, but there has never _been_ a person to ask this of. Except his Killu, his sweet Killu, who is not any person but Illumi's own God, and Illumi is the one assisting his cute brother. Killua may not know it yet, but Illumi is always there for him.

This was not what he'd come here for, however.

Hisoka turns to him in mild surprise, as if this was beyond his expectations, too.

Illumi doesn't see a point in stalling this further. "I'll be entering the next exam. I need to secure the License for a job of mine, and since you already know how the exam works, you can help me. I already found out where it will be held. You just need to show up."

As if this all made complete sense, Hisoka nods and hums and stretches his arm. He makes sure to casually brush against the other man's shoulders and draws back in alarm when the sensation of prickling needles sets the nerves in his arm on fire. He cradles his arm-turned-pincushion and frowns genuinely for the first time of the night. "Hey, you don't have to be so prickly," he remarks. He shuts up when a piece of paper is shoved in front of his face.

"Write down your number and I'll send over the details."

And before Hisoka can start writing on it with his own blood, Illumi ruins his fun by producing a pen. It's not even red. Heaving a sigh, Hisoka writes in in nondescript black ink and settles for adding a little black heart after it.

"Th_ere~_" he sings, and then adds his name (with two hearts this time) and contact information to the phone that now dangles in his hands. Illumi's. He would add more hearts and other symbols to his name, but he suspects he doesn't have a lot of time before Illumi takes it back. He sends an empty text to himself and then slides it back into Illumi's hidden pocket.

If Illumi had it in his plethora of emotions to look surprised, he probably would. He was never off-guard, but somehow the magician had obtained his phone before he could register its missing presence. Living up to his sneaky name, certainly. As it stands, he arches a delicate brow and shreds the piece of paper, now that it's no longer needed. He can feel his phone through the fabric of his clean-cut jacket and it feels oddly warm. Fleetingly, he takes in Hisoka's puffy sleeves, waist-accentuating crop-top and the bright palette, and thinks of his own practical black outfit and the rest of his achromatic wardrobe back home.

He systematically kills the thoughts veering off course in his mind. He had done what he'd set out to accomplish tonight. It was time to leave before being in the vicinity of silly con-magicians could cause lasting damage to the control he'd so meticulously built up.

In the meantime, Hisoka's mood had bounced back to a giddy high. "If I'm going to assist you, we're going to be best friends from now on! Ne, Illumi-kun?"

"Call it whatever you want," Illumi says carelessly, and disappears into the depths of the airship where he'd come from.

Careless, because he should've withdrawn earlier, or denied, or killed the Joker before the joke could turn on him.

(The rest of the journey, Hisoka spends it half-sober and half-looking-out-for-pretty-men-with-dark-tresses-and-darker-eyes. He doesn't see him again, but makes sure to send lots of cute texts to the number he'd added on his phone while he sits in the same spot in the bar. He doesn't get any replies either. How cold~)

Assassins don't have friends.

/ / / / / / / /

Hisoka doesn't take long to unearth Illumi's background. Illumi hadn't expected him to, either. After a few days of ignoring the hourly updates on Hisoka's whereabouts and psyche by the man himself, his phone alerts him of a new text message that finally deigns a reply.

**Hisoka  
><strong>Illumi Zoldyck, huh. (-_-;)

**Illumi  
><strong>Will that be a problem?

**Hisoka  
><strong>No, no, I'm honoured! (●´ω｀●)

**Hisoka  
><strong>To think that the prestigious Zoldyck family's first born son has heard of me (≧◡≦)

**Hisoka  
><strong>Sooo what are you up to, Illumi?

**Illumi  
><strong>Training my brother

**Hisoka  
><strong>More Zoldycks! You have to tell me which brother you're referring to. Killua? He's very cute

**Illumi  
><strong>!)($%*^%$#! #$%

**Illumi  
><strong>!*)#$%^&^$

**Illumi  
><strong>ASDFGHJWERTYJ$#!&#$#

**Illumi  
><strong>$!$&%LLJFAS!

**Illumi  
><strong>!

**Hisoka  
><strong>Oh my

**Hisoka  
><strong>{(x_x)}

**Hisoka  
><strong>Oh noes, I broke Illumi-kun (TT_TT)

**Illumi  
><strong>Don't mention Killua's name again or die

**Illumi  
><strong>Also I'll end our partnership

**Hisoka  
><strong>Anything but the partnership! (◕︵◕)

**Hisoka  
><strong>So, this is a partnership?

**Hisoka  
><strong>Can I ask what's in it for me?

**Hisoka  
><strong>Hisoka is happy to simply be of help to Illumi-kun, of course (^-^)

**Hisoka  
><strong>But partnerships benefit both parties, no?

**Illumi  
><strong>The alliance with a Zoldyck. Should you ever require our assistance, you'll have priority.

**Illumi**  
>And if you ever get a hit on your head I'll consider the possibility of not taking it.<p>

**Hisoka  
><strong>How about sex

Illumi doesn't reply, and Hisoka doesn't press, and they fall back to their comfortable and separate lifestyles as the day of the 287th Hunter Exam slowly draws near.

.

/ / / / / / / / /

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I'm so limited in emoticon choice ;A; Sorry, Hisoka, I cannot express you with the utmost precision.

To the readers - Thank you for reading. (:

-09/24/14


End file.
